Reaching Out

On the plane I was watching Gilmore Girl’s One Year Television Series my all time favorite show I realize how much a mother and daughter relationship they have together.

I am thankful I have that kind of relationship with my mom this was the first time my mom and I didn’t argue or fight during our recent trip.

My mom became expressing to me telling me what Yann is going through that I need to be there for her even if it means she had made a bad decision in her life.

It was her choice and even if she is suffering making the wrong choice we can’t scold and question her surrounding because she is no longer a child.

People make the wrong decision in life when they are desperate and feel so helpless.

People fall in a trap feeling there is something there when in reality our brain has made it seem it real but only a fantasy.

People fall to believe the past relationship and his family will fall back in place how it use to be even promise they have made.

In reality we made ourselves believe there was something to hold on while others moved on you haven’t let go.

Sometimes even if we don’t want our friends to feel the pain we hold them back.

Sometimes these people tend to rebel and tend not to inform you because they feel once you know you will not let them go.

Now, your friend is where she thought her real home was she now realizes she made the biggest mistake of her life.

She dwells on thinking on what if and drowns herself with sorrow while she cries away holding back not the world to see how she is.

When I went to the suicide area in Australia I was thinking of Yann I wanted her to know I am there for her I can cry with her as she experiencing what I don’t know.

I was trying to reach out to her out of concern in the beginning she had ignored my messages.

I didn’t want to quit reaching out to her. I felt she needed someone, but too shy to show or let me see what she was feeling.

Every time she would have my story or post something I would make a comment this was my only way to get her attention because she had ignored my messages.

I even made a video during my trip to let her know she is never alone.

During the end of my trip she finally message me letting me know she misses me and loves me. At the end of her message she had this crying face every time she had message me. 😢

Till this point I keep telling her to return to her homeland she doesn’t need to prove anything to us staying where she is.

I wanted her to know it is not the end of the world.

I even had a dream of her when I was in Australia in my dream she was in California and I was able to hug her in what she needed at this point in her life.

In my dream I was able to take her back where she belong to the Philippines to be with her daughter.

I woke up and message Yann about my dream finally she responded.

Sometimes we dream gives us away to reach out on those who try to be distance from us.

Everyone goes to this kind of pattern in our life feeling alone we already experience being alone, but not in the kind of sense being alone because I was broken hearted more being alone when I was walking in the Royal Botanical Garden.

Either way the feeling I felt may not be worse than someone else feeling at this point I realize some people have envy or became jealous of you even if they feel that way you express the way you are they become a part of your life as you share them pictures and video of your trip.

When you take a picture what do you see?

When I was traveling to Sydney, Australia and taking a video people we’re looking at me with curiousity wondering who I am talking too. People do things as well as we take a video when we’re talking alone or expressing what we want to share to others when they are not at their side.

What happens to the video we take we get to repeat the memories over again and recall back when the time we took it? Watching the video get the feel they are there too while their friend has taken that video.