How To Deal with In-Law's

To explain things first of all when you live with Filipino their custom and beliefs they have are quiet different than most other families when you are based in the Philippines.

1. They prefer their children to live in the same roof when they get married. 
2. There are some parents who buy them separate homes once they have their own family. 
3. There are parent's who prefer you living in the same house with other siblings. 
4. There are some parents who have separate homes, but live in the same complex.
5. There are children who choose to live separate and buy their own home.

How ever the situation is how do you deal with your in-law's?

I've lived with my in-law's for a very long time. It is not an easy moving in with your in-law's in their home with other family members.

When you are not use to having so many people in one home. 

I grew up in a simple and strict household. Our home was always quiet.

Once you step foot living in some one's home you loose the privacy.

You have more people to deal with and you will talked about how to raise your chilld the proper way. 

If, you are sensitive to receive remarks from them you will cry often from their criticized. You need to stay put and keep in mind they are your children and it is really up to you how you raise them. They are only suggesting how to raise your child the right way.

You can listen how they tell you to raise your child. It is up to you how well you judge them. They maybe right or wrong depending what the topic is all about.

I've learn to just listen to what they say. Even if you make a comment they will not listen to your opinion. In their minds they are right and you know less how to raise them. They will say they have been there before. They know what is best for you.

It is best to disagree with them when your child is not present. You don't want them to learn to disobey the people older than them.

In reality our lifestyle is far more different. We are so modern there are so many things to buy that can help raise our children the right or wrong way.

Your children will have to deal with sharing, but that is apart of life. Some day your child will need to learn and adapt themselves as they get older.

They will learn how to socialize with other member of the family.

Your child will adjust themselves when your in-law provide a nanny to take care of them.

You will have to take turns doing your laundry or someone will do it for you.

You will be eating the same time.

You will learn to cook and make meals with your in-law's.

Basically, you need to learn to adjust yourself in their lifestyle.

You will learn to respect your in-law's. You need to learn to show your appreciation to them as they had offered their home to you. 

I often offer and help the cook in the house. There are times you want to eat food from back home. The cook only knows how to cook only Filipino dishes. 

What I learn is to teach the cook how to make the food you want to eat. Until the cook knows how to make the dishes you want her to cook for you. I learn to type up the recipe and have a clear book so, she can review the recipe when your child request for the food.

It is best you make a list what food your child eat so it will be easier on every one. For example my children are very picky they don't really eat Filipino food. They are more Americanize. 

I even trained my nanny how to make the food for them in case they ask it when the cook is not available.

In the beginning your child will not like to be raised by someone else. They will adjust themselves gradually. That is normal if they cling on to you more.

What happens when you get a nanny and doesn't speak english? I have learn it is easy to teach a person to speak English. They too will learn eventually. I use to complain when I have a nanny that only spoke Tagalog. We had a hard time conversation with each other. I ended up talking to her in taglish mix of Tagalog and English. Later we understood each other in a long period of time.

Later my kids also learn slowly to speak Tagalog.

It is easier to teach your child at a young age in Tagalog than when they are older. 

Once you have a nanny it is best to make her a daily schedule and have it printed and placed in her room. It makes it easier for everyone and she has something to look back as her reference.